My brother hasn’t spoken to me since the summer when my parents found out about this blog. He accused me of “throwing everyone under the bus.” These were harsh words coming from someone who I took under my wing since he was born and I was an eleven year old big sister.
I recently sent him an email to try to repair things or get the conversation going. But no reply. It’s weird how things change. How a family member you’re so close to becomes a stranger. Not everyone gets my comedy. How unfortunate he couldn’t have been one who did.
We made a film together a few years ago. Somewhat based on true events, it’s about a lonely outsider who rediscovers his self-esteem through Salsa dancing. I practically forced him to do the film. He wound up feeling like a star.
You can check it out here:
https://www.thewatchbox.com/movies/21-the-big-shot-caller#video104
If you watch it, let me know your thoughts…
maureen
January 14, 2013
Sorry to hear about your estrangement. that really sucks. I hope it all works out in time for you all.
I really liked the preview! Looked like it had a little of everything in it. You are so creative. Keep writing! Keep filming!
My Parents Are Crazier Than Yours
January 14, 2013
Thanks, Maureen!
Mrs. C
January 14, 2013
I wanted to see more! It was great! Your brother reminds me of Toby Maguire
My Parents Are Crazier Than Yours
January 14, 2013
That’s so funny – people have always told him that.
Njenva
January 15, 2013
I hope that you two get back to talking terms soon – it’s not fun not being able to communicate with your sibling.
I loved the preview. Looks like a film I would enjoy watching!
Ariana
January 15, 2013
Honestly I am surprised by everything what was going on with your family. They are the first one, who suppose to support you and not financially, mentally, morally……
Miriam Joy
January 15, 2013
I hope you’re able to reconcile eventually — that sounds like a sticky situation. But I can understand that people don’t feel comfortable with their family being written about… even for comedy purposes :/
The Byronic Man
January 15, 2013
Wow, that’s hard. Family, it seems, has a way of coming back around, though. Eventually. Don’t give up.
My Parents Are Crazier Than Yours
January 16, 2013
Thanks, Byronic.
karensamenow
January 15, 2013
What’s the big deal? We’re all a little crazy anyway, isn’t that what makes life more interesting? My family is crazy too, & some don’t speak either! Everyone in the family knows they are fair game, so if they don’t want to see themselves on the front page, don’t do it or say it! I loved your post, it oddly gives me comfort!
My Parents Are Crazier Than Yours
January 16, 2013
I totally agree! If you don’t want to be written about and exposed to the masses – then DON’T BE CRAZY!!! How bout that???
LorB
January 15, 2013
Sorry to hear… Maybe one day he’ll snap out of it…
Mark Petruska
January 15, 2013
I went through an extended period where I had nothing to do with my brother, thanks to mistakes he made in the past. But eventually we mended that rift, and we’re closer today than at any point since we were kids. I’m hoping you and Tobey, I mean your brother, can find a similar way to get past your estrangement.
My Parents Are Crazier Than Yours
January 16, 2013
Thanks, Mark. Tobey does have a great sense of humor – but he is also very stubborn. We’ll see what happens.
Invisible Mikey
January 16, 2013
For a moment I felt “punked” to discover you had already made a 350k movie (which looked every bit as good as 3m btw), then I moved forward to better appreciate the reinvention of the self you present in here. It doesn’t matter who you have been, what you’ve done. The dilemma of how to balance the demands of art with the individual’s need for personal relationship is permanent and universal.
That’s always going to be a big question to keep answering for yourself. You only have so much energy and time. How much goes to the muse, and how much will you sacrifice on filial and fraternal altars. It’s such a test, a life sentence really. Back when I wasn’t “creating” anything and just worked retail I could maintain a dozen close friendships, have a significant other, and something substantial with my siblings and parents. Eventually the desire to produce works of expression, regardless of their commercial value, forced me to allow most of the relationships to drift away. But I still need love. It feeds the process of creating. And the process of creating inspires the need for love.
I can’t estimate how long it will take (if ever) for your brother or parents to understand the petard artists hoist themselves on voluntarily. It’s hard for those who haven’t chosen to give up “everything” to make stuff up to understand and accept. I can only wish you good health, since I have the same disease.
My Parents Are Crazier Than Yours
January 16, 2013
First of all, Mikey, you’re an amazing and articulate writer. You really hit the nail on the head with balancing the need to express oneself as an artist and live a life that includes love and connection. I’ve found most (everything) drift away and the only thing that’s left is me, my need to write (and my dog). Lonely. But, somehow unlimited.
Go Jules Go
January 16, 2013
Oh no! Well that just sucks. But I agree with Byronic Man – don’t give up. I can’t wait to watch the film.
Jill Pinnella Corso
January 24, 2013
I’m so sorry about your brother. It just seems unfair.
That move looks, like, really good.
Life in the Boomer Lane
January 26, 2013
Ah, family. Can’t be born without them, can we? Sometimes, all we can do is to let go of the right/wrong thing, stay loving, and create a welcoming space for reconciliation to show up. Sometimes, when we least suspect it, someone actually walks into the space.
Just Another Canadian Gurl
January 27, 2013
Sometimes people just have to get over themselves,,,even brothers,,I haven’t spoken to mine for over a year. Not intentionally, I just get the feeling that he feels that he is “better” than me at this point in his life,,,meh,,what ev,,when he gets off his high horse I’ll be here, but I sure as hell am not grovelling to him, lol.