Every Thursday in the rec room is Ping Pong from 11-1. I decide to show up today, merely for anthropological observatory purposes. My father is wearing goggles, a sweatband, gym shorts and tube socks that go up to his knees. Because he got here early, he is already at the table playing his first round. … [Read more…]
May 10, 2012
The neighbor next door is a widow with blonde hair and lots of money. She has a Yorkshire Terrier named Kirby. I’ve heard about this fabulous little dog, but still haven’t met him. I expressed how much I’d like to meet him, being that I’m such a dog lover, and my father would always say,… [Read more…]
May 5, 2012
It was with true resistance that I stepped through the doors of the medical annex. And it was with mild delight that the man seating there when I walked in made me feel at home instantly. All this for $29, I thought. I should try Groupon more often. “What’s your name?” “Myra. And you’re…” “James.”… [Read more…]
May 2, 2012
I have to be honest when I say that there is more than one reason I came down to Florida to be with the crazies. Yes, there was the issue of no real place to stay…and no job. Sure. But, as hesitant as I am to admit it, I was slightly worried about my father. … [Read more…]
April 24, 2012
While my parents packed up the boxes of random hoarded items and things they refused to throw away over the years, many things ran through my head. Like, the memory of being five-years-old and seeing this house being built for the first time. All the birthday parties where my secret wish of having different parents… [Read more…]
January 25, 2012
I’m a couple of weeks into the new job at the most dysfunctional restaurant ever, and I’m really trying my best to stay positive. Every time the owner, who I must repeat looks like a mental institution escapee and sounds like a bear or perhaps wild boar, comes into the restaurant, he berates the managers,… [Read more…]
January 11, 2012
After a year of redundancy at my wacko parents’ house on Long Island, it’s now time for a job – in Manhattan! I show up to train for my new waitressing job in a man’s white shirt and red tie. I’ve never worn anything like this before, and frankly, I’d rather be dressing for Hooters. … [Read more…]
December 20, 2011
So, I’m here in Brooklyn trying to get a job. I’m staying with a friend of a friend, whom we’ll call Grant. As in tomb. I’m living out of a suitcase and sleeping on the couch with Vito in a desperate attempt to get back on my feet and live in the city once again. … [Read more…]
December 13, 2011
Last night I found a comment from a reader that was touching, disturbing, heartfelt and angry. For the first time I thought, Maybe my parents aren’t the craziest ones out there. When I started reading his comment, I almost immediately dismissed it as left-hating, Tea Party-esque banter. But, I’m glad I didn’t. The struggles we… [Read more…]
December 7, 2011
The safety net that is the shithole of a home you grew up in is no longer a safety net. The crazy parents you hate and love at the same time, but mostly hate, are no longer your back up plan. The dog you thought was your best friend is still ripping apart the garbage… [Read more…]
June 1, 2012
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